beenstrugglein

You think the pursuit of  happiness is sad come live my life................as a man this is hard to say and ask for ...............but i have an 19 month old son im a single father in a one bed room apartment whos car was stole at the beginning of this year in which like an idiot i didnt have full coverage insurance which now i take a taxi and bum rides wherever i go to work , grocery store etc  and lost an decent job as an forklift driver in an warehouse  and 2 bedroom apartment  i had because of it i live where there is no busline were i had to take a smaller place to live because of finances and now cant afford daycare,  or were i live and im really stuggleing to pay bills .......and my rents only $550 a month  in which im two months behind and there going to evict me by May 05, 2007   i payed it downed  to $867 but that doesnt count Mays rent  but also have an disconnection notice on my lights and gas in which my gas bill is $217 and my gas is $376 and because of the man that i am i refuse to get on any type of government assistance  for help because i was raised on welfare and i made a promise to myself to never in life live off the system as my family did, so on that note i was forced  to take  a job i walk at least 3 miles to and from work  if i dont have money for an taxi or who normally takes me home isnt scheduled which is kmart where i only make $7.00 dollars an hour and only partime because they cant afford a fulltimer right  so only can get maybe 27 hours on a good week and thats clocking in early and leaveing late  in which i can get in trouble for work if i do it too much now so on the side i cut grass , clean gutters cut  down trees  to just to try to make it but im at the end of my rope.......................... im lost and i dont know what to do all i want is an door open for me i pray everynight wit me and my son and  all in my miind i think i need is a good car not one to break down on me every week just a good $3000 to $5000 dollar car  and i believe in me and i know ill get a good job and take care of my business as a father first then a man...........I DONT WANT TO RESORT TO A LIFE OF CRIME .............. i dont want it..............i wanna see my son graduate and go to college and start an saving account right now for that ill do the struggleing for him  so that he can make it...............and if u wanna know where the moma at shes 2 steps from bein in the crazy house seriously and its not her  fought  its her.......thats all im gonna say on that ........man im stressing bad and my backs against the wall and i need a godsend........i wrote this from the heart........so if any bodys out there  listening i need a hand up thts all i ask for once in my life.....................................................goood will bless u ...........$3000-$5000 is worth a million to me right now................ any info for help email me at redofnrt@aol.com